The documentary Mom, I Have Something to Tell You examines the relationships between gay men and their mothers through interviews with families. Its producer and director says the film grew out of years of clinical work and conversations that revealed how significant these relationships could be, despite receiving little attention in the literature she reviewed.
The filmmaker says many gay men she encountered described difficult childhoods marked by discrimination, bullying, neglect or abuse. In their accounts, a supportive mother who nurtured and defended them helped them find their voice and feel accepted. The film also gives sons a chance to tell their mothers directly what that support has meant to them.
The documentary debuted on YouTube and has received more than 35,000 views, according to its creator. She says audience responses have included laughter, tears and personal stories, and that viewers have connected the family experiences on screen with their own relationships.
One viewer, identified as David, had not spoken to his mother about being gay, despite believing she may have suspected. After watching the film, he found the courage to talk with her about his identity for the first time in 20 years, the filmmaker says.
The project followed the creator’s interviews with gay men and their mothers, which she began conducting after her clinical work led her to explore the subject. She later founded the nonprofit Gay Sons & Mothers and started a video series, Mothers Who Inspire, featuring mothers discussing the challenges and joys of raising gay sons.
Among those featured in the series is Judy Shepard, who founded the Matthew Shepard Foundation in memory of her son. The filmmaker has also presented the material to medical communities, young people’s events, workplaces and professional organizations, adapting the format for different audiences.
The film’s central focus is the value of mothers who affirm their sons and stand up for them, sometimes in the face of opposition from family, community or cultural settings. Its creator says sharing these stories can give recognition to that support and help others reflect on the relationships that shaped their lives.
Sources: Psychology Today.